On an episode of the Oprah Winfrey Show (April, 16, 2009) two teenagers professed their love for each other and their desire to have sex at the mature age of fourteen. The young teens were congratulated for taking their request to their parents and seeking assistance on their endeavor. One parent was so proud of her son she even took him to get the condoms. Have we as a society become so progressive that as parents we take down instead of taking a stand, all to be cool. Children should be able to speak to their parents about sex and parents should talk to their children about sex, but let us please get past the feeling of sex and start talking about the consequences attached to the act of love-making. Some consequences are too difficult for adults to handle - let alone children. Yes, sex feels good, yes it is special when it is done with one’s spouse (yes I unapologetically prescribe to sex only in marriage), but what about the consequences of an unwanted pregnancy, STDs, and the ever- popular dumping after sex? According to an O, The Oprah Magazine and Seventeen magazine sex survey, 46 percent of 15- to 18-year-old girls who have had intercourse claim their mothers don't know, 78 percent of girls who have had intercourse did not use condoms, and 56 percent say they used no birth control at all. How to use a condom or what birth control to use should not be the only part of the sex talk. Value has been taken out of the act because it has been taken out of the conversation.
Sex therapist Dr. Laura Berman posed some excellent questions to the love struck teens, their answers revealed that not only are they not ready for sex but that the worth of sex has been diminished. Shows like Gossip Girl and Beverly Hills 90210 (the latest version) have been blamed for corrupting the morals of today’s youth, but shows like Sex and the City and Desperate Housewives are corrupting how adults view love and sex. On the Oprah Winfrey Show sentiments such as "they are teenagers they are going to have sex”, "abstinence does not work", and “if they love each other what is the problem” were used throughout the dialogue like a white flag in a battle. When did we give up? When did it become wrong to show displeasure for the decisions our children make? Or to even say “NO” to something they want to do, and I have a better question… where was this belief when I was a teenager? But I digress. Many teenagers make decisions according to fluctuating hormones, the popular crowd, and whatever the latest teen magazine says; sixteen-year-old Miley Cyrus is “dating” a twenty-year-old man and many think it is cute. As parents we cannot take down because of our emotions, the popular talk show, and whatever the latest style magazine says.
When asked how long they plan to stay together after having sex their answer showed that at fourteen this young girl was experiencing what many women go through at any age. Both teens said a long time, but the young lady’s idea of a long time was “a long time” the young man’s idea of a long time was “6 months to a year.” Ouch! At the end of the show the young lady proclaimed that she will hold off on having sex with her boyfriend, the entire audience gave her a standing ovation. Call me cynical, but without a spiritual understanding about the true worth of sex beyond the physical, I see hormones, the popular crowd, and the latest teen magazine winning in the end.
Sex therapist Dr. Laura Berman posed some excellent questions to the love struck teens, their answers revealed that not only are they not ready for sex but that the worth of sex has been diminished. Shows like Gossip Girl and Beverly Hills 90210 (the latest version) have been blamed for corrupting the morals of today’s youth, but shows like Sex and the City and Desperate Housewives are corrupting how adults view love and sex. On the Oprah Winfrey Show sentiments such as "they are teenagers they are going to have sex”, "abstinence does not work", and “if they love each other what is the problem” were used throughout the dialogue like a white flag in a battle. When did we give up? When did it become wrong to show displeasure for the decisions our children make? Or to even say “NO” to something they want to do, and I have a better question… where was this belief when I was a teenager? But I digress. Many teenagers make decisions according to fluctuating hormones, the popular crowd, and whatever the latest teen magazine says; sixteen-year-old Miley Cyrus is “dating” a twenty-year-old man and many think it is cute. As parents we cannot take down because of our emotions, the popular talk show, and whatever the latest style magazine says.
When asked how long they plan to stay together after having sex their answer showed that at fourteen this young girl was experiencing what many women go through at any age. Both teens said a long time, but the young lady’s idea of a long time was “a long time” the young man’s idea of a long time was “6 months to a year.” Ouch! At the end of the show the young lady proclaimed that she will hold off on having sex with her boyfriend, the entire audience gave her a standing ovation. Call me cynical, but without a spiritual understanding about the true worth of sex beyond the physical, I see hormones, the popular crowd, and the latest teen magazine winning in the end.
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